While growing up on the farm, there was never a need to see prejudice at work. Not to say there was none, but the occasion never presented itself. Our school was segregated and there was no mention of the small minority school across town - so with being young in that era, I accepted what was normal for the time. I still have no prejudice today, or so I thought!
I understand prejudice. I was in the situation of being the minority once, and it made me very uncomfortable. I was not sure why, other than it having something to do with not understanding the language. Were they talking about me? To me? At me? I wasn’t sure.
For over a year, I have been seeing an Endocrinologist from India. A man of medium build and stature, his skin tone is that of most of East India descent, a light brown. He made very little eye contact, and often when I left his office, I felt I was no more informed about my Thyroid than I was when I went in. Opting to get some information, (any information) I went to the Internet to understand what Hypo vs. hyperactive meant for me. Was my Thyroid considered over active or under active. Evidently, those terms are not used anymore, as trying to ask the proper questions to the Dr. (whose name I could not pronounce for almost a year and can't spell even now) brought no clarity.
I've learned also, that telling a Doctor you've consulted the Internet doesn't go over very well. They do not seem to understand that to find answers, often a patient may have to resort to sources outside the Dr's proficiency. Needless to say, they don't take kindly to someone appearing more well-informed then they on caring for themselves or their health.
After a year of the same symptoms, I had when I went to him in the first place, sluggish, weight gain, course hair, etc. etc. I decided to consult another physician. I know these are signs and symptoms of Thyroid disease. So saddled with this information, I took my health records , which brings me to the next Physician and the continuation of my story.
I insisted my husband go with me yesterday to listen. I learned the new Doctor was indeed new. One who had only recently joined the diagnostic group. My heart was about to bolt and cause running feet, but decided to accept that having a new-fresh-out-of-school, still wet behind the ears Doctor, who had only recently finished up his internship may not be all bad. I surmised that maybe, just maybe, he had more current information on hypo or hyper Thyroid ism, DUH!
With the name Hamid my first thought was "Muslim". I did not bother to ask for a first name. Maybe I ought to have. While we were waiting in the exam room, my husband and I had a small bet going on the nationality of Dr. Hamid. The name could have been African-American we were not sure. Knowing my background, I would gladly have welcomed someone of African descent.
Instead, shortly a knock on the door and stepping inside was a small young woman, with light brown skin, not appearing to weigh 110 pounds soaking wet, with beautiful long black shining hair held back with a rubber band so that it hang to her waistline - from India! My heart fell as I tried to listen through her thick accent. She hurled questions at me like the pro she was. I had to have her repeat many of them until I wonder if she might have thought I had hearing problems. Trying not to appear rude, I wondered what one does but ask them to "say that again"? Otherwise, I may answer those 90 endless questions with inappropriate answers.
One thing that brings about a burr under my saddle is for someone, anyone, to talk down to me in a lofty subservient manner. After driving home a point I had already well understood, it became apparent she thought I was asking for a higher dosage of the medication I was already taking.
"Giving you more medication than you need will cause too many side affects that are worse than the problem you already have."
OK that is plain English in an Indian accent. I heard that. Idea well received. However when I heard the same message seven more ways in plain English with an Indian accent, I had to speak up. "You sound like you are suggesting I want a dosage increase just for the sake of a higher dosage. I don't like that".
She stopped long enough to show signs of hearing me, and then kept going with the same speed without slowing down again.
"You don't want Atrial Fibrillation, or thinning bones, they are irreversible". I heard that earlier, now she was saying it again. I was about to repeat myself when she finally started telling me something else about nodules growing on my Thyroid glands that she would check again with an ultra sound.
I left her office after all the tests and blood work with no firm answers. I surmised however, that my sluggishness and weight gain is not a Thyroid problem after all. I do not know where else to turn next. I will keep going to the Fitness Center and watching my diet, but I am about to resort to an over the counter metabolism booster.
Another thing I surmised is I am not perfect, and that maybe, just maybe, I might be prejudice against people from New Delhi India. I am glad God is still working on me to make me what I ought to be!
Grammyof13
